EP 348: Boundaries With Terri Cole

When we let fear hold us back from setting boundaries, we miss out on healthy relationships and real love. 

What keeps you from setting clear boundaries with the people in your life?

Are you afraid of judgment? Being thought of as high-maintenance, mean, or controlling?

Or maybe you don’t know HOW to set boundaries in a way that works?

In today’s episode, we’re talking with Terri Cole, licensed psychotherapist and author of Boundary Boss: The Essential Guide to Talk True, Be Seen, and (Finally) Live Free. In her book, Terri teaches her readers how to set boundaries in a way that will help us live healthier, happier lives.

I have to be honest (always!): I rarely finish a book. But when I received my copy of Boundary Boss, I couldn’t put it down. I finished it in three days! 

As I was reading, I kept thinking about you, my listeners. 

If you’re searching for ways to live an authentic life as both fully human and fully divine, you need to set boundaries.

Boundaries aren’t about being bossy or controlling or selfish. Boundaries are about making clear your preferences, desires, limits, and deal-breakers to live a more honest, embodied life.

Among other things, clearly and consistently communicated boundaries:

• Are an act of self-love and self-respect
  
  
• Show you to be a trustworthy person
  
  
• Prevent feelings of bitterness and hurt
  
  
• Hold everyone accountable in a relationship
  
  
• Helps you attract the right people into your life

But setting boundaries when you haven’t before can also be scary.

Fortunately, boundary-setting isn’t all-or-nothing. It comes down to doing the next right thing, one baby step at a time. In Boundary Boss, Terri walks us through those baby steps in a way that is accessible and totally doable.

Join us in today’s episode to hear more about how feeling empowered and respected really is possible. 

Listen to episode 348 now!

In episode 348 of the Embodied Podcast we discuss:

• [9:15] How boundaries build trust and keep you from second-guessing yourself and others
  
• [11:33] How communicating your boundaries is a generous act and does not make you “high-maintenance”
  
• [19:36] How enforcing boundaries helps you attract the right people and repel the wrong ones
  
• [22:20] The power of direct communication to strengthen relationships
  
• [28:05] The different forms of communication and why we use them
  
• [34:07] How we can determine what our limits are to be able to start communicating them
  
• [39:34] What the different types of boundary pushers are and how to deal with them
  
• [44:44] What a “VIP Section” is and how to be discerning about who we allow in it

 

For full show notes and resources, head to https://untameyourself.com/podcasts/348

 

About the EMBODIED Podcast with Elizabeth DiAlto 

Since 2013 I’ve been developing a body of work that helps women embody self love, healing and wholeness. We do this by focusing on the four levels of consciousness - physical, mental, emotional and spiritual.

In practical terms this looks like exploring tools and practices to help you  tune into the deep wisdom of the body and the knowing of the heart, which I believe are gateways to our souls. Then we cultivate a new relationship with our minds that allows the mind to serve this wisdom and knowing and soul connection, rather than override it, which is what many of us were taught.

If you’ve been doing self help or spiritual development work for a while, these are the types of foundational things that often people overlook in pursuit of fancier concepts that often aren’t practical or sustainable. Here, we will focus on building these strong foundations so you can honestly and thoroughly embody self love. If you’re feeling it, subscribe to the show, and leave us a review wherever you listen from. You can also keep up with show updates and community discussion on Instagram here.